Last week was the week I had dreaded for so long… I went back to work.

Keep in mind, I’m very part-time this year — only two days a week — so I’m still very blessed to get to spend the majority of my time at home with Cora, but even that reality that didn’t curb the back-to-work crazies I still felt in the days leading up to the first day back.

You working moms have experienced it too, and I’m guessing stay-at-home moms feel the same way the first day of preschool or kindergarten, but there’s just something deep and visceral about leaving your baby like that for the first time. I mean, I’m tearing up now just trying to describe it.

Don’t let my tears mislead you though, things went about as well as they could have. The first day leaving Cora was very hard. I cried and cried as I nursed her right before I left and even cried a little at school the first time one of my colleagues asked how I was doing. But once my first class came and the day started rolling, it felt pretty good to be back. I love my school and I love the people I work with, and I remembered just how much when I was there.

The second day at work was harder than the first in terms of getting back in the swing of things with the kids — my expectations, routines, etc., but we’ll get there. My elective class of middle schoolers and high schoolers is a bit of a challenge now, too, just because we don’t really know each other yet. But, as I recall it took about half the school year last year to really build a relationship with my teenagers from last year, so I know it will just take some time, especially since I’m less experienced with that age group. The elementary school kids will love you from the moment you open the door if they get a good sense about you, but the pre-teens and teenagers take some time. And it’s kind of hilarious to me that in my schedule my preschoolers and high schoolers are back to back.

Pumping at work is going pretty well. I mean, it’s not fun… but pumping is never fun. I miss having the time to get things done or socialize, but on the flip-side, it’s kind of nice to have a quiet break in the middle of the busyness during which you’re guaranteed to not be disturbed.

Cora had a great first day at Miss Marcy’s. She slept a lot better than I expected and had fun with Levi. The second day at Marcy’s she had a little bottle strike. I thought we were over that, but she and Marcy eventually got through it. Hopefully that won’t happen much. I pulled out every kind of bottle I have to send in her bag on Wednesday. Marcy sends me pictures and little updates. I sometimes have to sit on my hands to not ask how she’s doing several times a day. I want to know, but sometimes I don’t want to know because there’s nothing I can do about it while I’m at work.

Cora hanging out with Levi

Some funnies from the kiddos:

Singing “Peace Like a River” with kindergarten and I hear… “I’ve got peas in the river, I’ve got peas in the river, I’ve got peas in the river in my soul!!”

During afternoon duty, one of my middle school boys from last year says hello and then tells me, “Miss! I’m finally over 4-feet now! I’m 5’3″!”

“Uhh… congratulations!”

Side note, for whatever reason, the middle schoolers and high schoolers have a habit of calling the teachers “Miss.” Like, just “Miss.” It doesn’t really bug me, but I know some of my colleagues insist on their last name being attached to the “Miss.” Sometimes I feel like maybe I should care, but whatever.

Also, my high school girls were considering my 4 1/2 month maternity leave at the end of class on Friday:

“Man, that’s like another Summer…”

I looked at the group of girls and I responded with a smirk, “Yeah, ‘cuz I was going to the beach and sleeping in and stuff…”

“Well, yeah, I mean you had to feed your baby and all, but still…” I thought that was hilarious. And they’re sweet girls, so it wasn’t with an attitude or anything.

Enjoying our family day today, and then tomorrow I’ll write my lessons in detail (outlines are done) and gear up to be back to work on Wednesday. If I’m honest, I’m dreading it a little again, but I just keep praying peace and joy over me and Cora like I’ve been doing in the weeks leading up to going back… and it will be Saturday again before I know it.